Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Still struggling, but making a choice to see otherwise!

I was in the shower after writing the previous post and am literally typing this in between getting dressed and putting contacts in. I want to write what pops in my head randomly that is GOOD in my life, I need a reminder:

1) Kids who at this moment turned off their morning cartoons, are getting dressed and brushing their teeth all without me asking them too...and I'll bet if I go look their breakfast dishes are already in the dishwasher. Oh yea, and I hear one of them playing their keyboard that gives me a smile as it was an unexpected gift from someone who has added so much to my life.

2) Dominick was out as usual at the crack of dawn, working to support us. What a gift to have a husband who takes his responsibilities so seriously and does the job so well! And is so quiet in the morning when he leaves so we can all sleep in ;-)

3) The sunlight through my bedroom windows (we have 4 of them in a small room) cheers my soul.

4) Friends in my life who love me and encourage me, who I could call at 2:00 AM and instead of hearing a nasty "Whaddaya want?" on the other end I would find only concern...and they would cry with me.

5) I have food in the fridge (right now, lots of it actually with our guests coming!).

6) My bed was warm and cozy last night.

Walking away from my list to get dressed...

7) I have a nice minivan to drive which starts easily when I put the key in the ignition. For some reason I am always grateful for that after owning a few clunkers in my day.

8) Books...man I LOVE books! I have 4 of them started sitting around the house, and I am so happy for a plethora of books at our library, for those who loan me theirs!

9) God's ability to refresh and renew us, moment by moment. I'll still be in a funk after writing this, but it will be a "lighter shade of funk"...hahahaha

10) A husband who whispers softly in the middle of the night when I am still wide awake mulling over my life "I hope you feel better tomorrow".

11) The ability to see good in others, even when at moments you don't like the way they are acting. Took me years to develop that!

12) Glasses and contacts. As I put them in my eyes I think how much happier I am with contacts, how much better I see (at almost negative 10 diopters in each eye, you truly do give thanks for corrected vision! I know what blindness is like as I experience it each day when the glasses come off).

13) A closet full of clothes. I may not like the way I look in any of them, but I have clean clothing and though not fancy it covers my body and keeps me safe and warm.

14) Our globe willow trees, their shape is lovely and we grew them from $20 Walmart sticks and they are beautiful!

15) The person helping us financially to adopt the girls...I think if her daily with gratitude and amazement.

16) Diet Coke. Caffeine. More Diet Coke. Need I say more?

17) Sons who pushed me aside with $300 worth of Walmart shopping yesterday as they emptied the cart and then loaded the car, then lugged it all in the house saying "Step aside Mom, this is a job for real men!".

Aforementioned glasses off, contacts going in...

18) Hair. At least I have some. I don't often like mine, it is not pretty, it is not a nice texture or style, but I have it and I am glad I am not losing any as some have at my age. Don't care if it goes gray or not.

19) Colorado sunsets, then most beautiful in the entire world...blazing oranges and peaches and often reflections off clouds which create amazing views.

20) A toilet with toilet paper. Sanitation. Things I take for granted that keep us all healthier.

21) Friends who call Kazakhstan a million times with you, interrupting their evening, to interpret over a frustrating passport issue.

I could name a dozen more easily, but need to get moving. Funny...I DO feel a little better after just taking a brief few minutes to think only of good in my life.

There is so much. Who cares about the rest?


Joyce said...

I did to this more often - writing down things I am thankful for. It looks so good on paper that hopefully it moves in to my heart.

Lisa said...

What a beautiful and hearfelt post. I didn't really know at what point in the process you were for your beloved daughter and am saddened that another birthday will be missed.

I will think of you all...I care and I know others do too....I understand and will add my prayers that she is covered in God's grace and feels your love, tomorrow and always.

What a lovely gift this post will be for her one day.

Take much care,

Lenore Ryan said...

A beautiful posting, Cindy!! Thinking of you!!

Maureen said...

Good for you! It is so easy to let a "funk" take hold, but you decided to fight it. I need to do this more often when I get in my funks. I hope you had a wonderful weekend with your friends from Chicago!

Bob; Carrie DeLille said...

You're too funny. What an excellent exercise we should all do!!