Awhile back I wrote a post about Divine Coincidence, and a couple of hours ago I was blessed with another which I can't wait to share!!
Adoption news has been scant the past few months. It has been growing ever-more-difficult to answer people's caring questions about "Any news on the girls?" or "Are you still waiting? Will you ever get them home?". Our dossier process has been interminably long and an incredible struggle this time around, unlike our past experiences and it has sometimes led me to question if God has been trying to tell us something that we are ignoring...like maybe we were pushing for something that was never intended to happen. When I began to feel that way, I had to remind myself of all the obvious signals that we had been given that indeed we were on the right path and should continue to plod through, despite the uphill battle. Somewhere buried very deep inside there is no doubt, but on the surface ripples of fear appear once in awhile. When I have had passing thoughts of giving up, I also remind myself that there is not another single, solitary soul in the entire world who will fight for my daughters. They are nobodies, they are not important or precious to anyone but us. If we give up, there IS no one else to advocate for them, to restore their faith in familial commitment and love.
One of our obstacles was obtaining Matthew's new Kazakh passport. His old one had expired, and we reapplied back in October of 2008 for a new one. You would think this would be a fairly simple process. After all, we applied for Kenny's US passport 3 weeks ago and received it this past weekend, no sweat. Well, not every country operates the way we do and keeping that in mind that is why we started so early...and I am very glad we did. After a visit to the Kazakh Embassy in Washington, DC, at least 10 calls with the help of our friend to the Ministry of Foreign Affairs in Astana, Kazakhstan, and countless fretful nights worrying about it, we had a message on our machine yesterday from the Embassy in DC that Matthew's passport is completed and back here at the Embassy!!!
The mere thought of leaving Matthew behind was enough to make me want to cry. It is an incredible gift from our Adoption Angels that we are able to also bring along the boys...and in our minds an extremely important part of the forming of our family to have them present as we adopt their sisters (not our daughters...we are bringing home THEIR sisters!). Each time in the past when we have traveled there was no question that regardless of how much longer we would have to pay on loans, we would bring the boys along. We just couldn't imagine doing it any other way. If we were at the hospital they would be there looking through the nursery window and we feel that in large part we have had very smooth transitions as we have added to our family because our sons understood every step of the way what had happened, what their sibling's life was like pre-adoption, and it also helped them better understand their own adoption story. Additionally, we simply can not leave Joshua behind...it would set us back months if not years in terms of attachment issues. So we are eternally grateful for this opportunity to have our family remain together as we add another page to our adoption story.
And now on to the "Divine Coincidence"...
I have said all along that regardless of my heart's desire to get a travel date as soon as possible, if it meant waiting for travel longer so that we could be certain Matt's passport issues were resolved then I would happily wait another month or two.
I have also said I would not feel comfortable moving forward with actually painting a bedroom or buying anything to prepare until we got word that our dossier had left the Embassy here in the US for Kazakhstan.
After receiving word yesterday about Matt's passport, guess what news I received today via email...
Our dossier is FINALLY FINALLY FINALLY approved by the Embassy here and is at this moment winging it's way to Kazakhstan via FedEx!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Mere coincidence, or Divine Coincidence?
You may think what you may, but I feel I am witnessing God's plan unfolding before me.
Funny how I type all of this, and don't feel that ripple of emotional excitement. Instead my response seems to be one of urgency to get to work. Lists need to be made, a bedroom needs to somehow be put together in girlie fashion, tentative plans can now be made with an eye towards traveling in a couple of months, no longer is it "sometime" but "we think in 8-12 weeks or so"! When you can count it in weeks, it somehow seems I am more "pregnant". But we have been there and done that, we know what needs to be accomplished at this stage and are anxious to begin looking at airfare, comparing costs, gathering items and making preparations that are possible this early.
At least we have moved from "if" to "when", and that lifts my heart more than I can begin to tell you.
One day soon, our entire miraculous story will be shared here on the blog. One day soon our heartache will change to heart singing. One day soon, my arms will be draped around more children I dearly love and can't imagine living without.
One day soon....