You know, you just have to laugh when adopting from Central Asia. Information ends up being flat out wrong...birth dates are wrong, history or background info ends up being conflicting, and you never really quite know what the truth is although you eventually sort out something resembling a story that makes sense.
Today, Irina and I both realized Olesya is not 9. She is 10 years old, but started school a year behind. BOTH Irina and I had been under the impression she was 9, and somehow Dominick had figured it out when applying for their health insurance and asked me about birth dates being correct, but I thought he was talking about Angela as hers was obviously off by a couple of years. I didn't really pay attention to Olesya's and there were 2 school years between them. Just as Irina did, it didn't click. Dominick never followed up with our conversation saying "Gee...did you 'get it' that Olesya is 10?"
Tonight we were at a little restaurant where there was this play place where the cut off age was 10 years old and the subject came up and all of a sudden, Irina and I realized at the same time that our 9 year old Olesya was indeed our TEN year old Olesya.
So why is that bothering me a little? You just wrap your mind around one set of facts then it becomes different. So now our family has two sets of virtual twins, not one:
In descending order:
Angela 11 years old - April 22, 1998
Kenny 11 years old - November 15, 1998
Matthew 10 years old - June 12, 1999
Olesya 10 years old - August 12, 1999
Joshua 7 years old - December 26, 2002
How in the world did we manage to create this mess???? HAHAHAHA!!! Here I thought we had spread them out at least a little bit and now we realize they are ALL just months apart in age, even if they are years apart in maturity and educational standing.
So now we have an 11 year old who has had 4 1/2 years of school, an 11 year old who has had 3 1/2 years of school, a 10 year old with 2 1/2 years of school, a 10 year old with 5 1/2 years of school, and a 7 year old with 1 1/2 years of school.
Oh my. Talk about all over the map!! I am going to need a personal secretary just to keep track of this!
Add in there that Matthew is working well ahead of grade level and is about 2 years ahead at times in maturity he will likely always be our "oldest" in our minds with Angela running a close second but Matthew is now really our very middle child. Kenny is working well below grade level and is way behind in maturity and although our second oldest is more like our second youngest. Olesya is obviously not really ten in some ways in maturity and at least at the moment strikes me as being somewhat like Kenny when he first came home...having to touch and look at everything. Then we have Angela who has seen way too much for her age including several of the Halloween movies and who knows what all else at the orphanage in addition to the horrors she witness in real life and is TOO mature in some ways and needs to grab hold of a childhood and step backwards of possible.
Hmmmm...should make for some interesting and quite confusing blog fodder at some point, don't you think?
We LaJoy's just tend to break all the rules of adopting, don't we? I don't think in "Adoption 101" they teach you to adopt out of birth order and especially not to create 2 sets of twins. Glad we don't follow the rule book too closely and follow a more important Rule Book, the one God sets out for us that supercedes all. Kids need love and a home, if you can give them one, do it...and I'll send you the right kids. Follow THAT rule book and hopefully all will work out OK. We will see in the future and you may either watch us go down in flames or rise from the ashes. Who knows?
Olesya is 10....10....10...I have two 10's and two 11's and a mini-7. Eventually it will stick in my head!
Can I tell you I am tired just re-reading what I wrote? Funny how one little bit if information can totally change your thinking. It's not that it changes anything really, it does not effect much at all I guess...but it sort of does if it only changes my perception a little bit, which it sort of does.
Everything sort of does change, and sort of doesn't. And I know I am making no sense at all.