Thursday, March 19, 2009

Red Fish, Blue Fish!!

There is a mommy who has struggled, trying to find her way. Failed attempts to get pregnant, road blocks everywhere for adoption, you name it, Lori has experienced it. I was blessed to chat with her on the phone once, as she was trying to sort out her own confusion. I doubt I offered any insight at all that was meaningful, but perhaps she found comfort in just being heard.

Lori had some great news today, after IVF she announced today that she is pregnant. You can visit her at: http://loridoesmd.blogspot.com/ . Lori has offered so much support to waiting Kyrgyzstan families, and although it ultimately seems she will not be adopting from Kyrgyzstan herself now, I think her support deserves reciprocation. She continues to be an unflagging source of encouragement to waiting adoptive families, even as it seems her adoption journey is coming to an end.

I have never known the feeling of being pregnant, never had a child growing inside my womb, never had morning sickness. If flipped around, we could say that biological moms have never had to sweat out the paperwork, never had to worry about unknown birth parent histories, never had to worry about making the wrong "choice" when selecting a child.

We all come to parenthood in different ways, none is better or more "precious"...or more valid...than another. All paths to parenthood come with uncertainties and joys.

Lori, congratulations...and in all jest, I sure hope I "deliver" before you do!!

3 comments:

Lori said...

I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed at just how many people have been pulling for me! I told John it was WAY better than my birthday! :)

Ha ha...I think I've mentioned it to you before, but in case I haven't, you should absolutely know that not only was I comforted by what you had to say, it was nice to have someone be HONEST and let me know that it just may not be in the cards, so to speak...and that was ok. And that call, several months ago, was a precursor to my actions--a deciding factor in choices we would take with regard to IVF, domestic...just options in general.

You are right...I think we will be pulling out of the Kyrgyzstan ring...regardless of the outcome of this pregnancy, as it is still early. I think you said it all to me when you said, "I think you already have some answers" and I knew you were right--Kyrgyzstan was put on my radar for a DEFINITE purpose. I've *met* wonderful people, had my eyes opened to needs that I have been able to help with, and have basically had my eyes opened to a much bigger world.

I'm still saddened at the what could have/should have been...but know in my heart that it was just not meant to be.

And I will always, always, always still have a picture in my mind of a little Kyrgyz girl, running around in pigtails and popsicle mouth and giggling madly. She's out there...and whoever eventually ends up getting to be her mommy will be very lucky indeed.

I TOTALLY hope you *deliver* before me!!! WAY before me!

Bob; Carrie DeLille said...

Amen!!

Kami and Scott said...

Hi Cindy- Thanks for sharing Lori's story. I was happy to hear that she is expecting after so many years of heartache. My husband and I also tried to have bio children for almost 10 years. And BOY did we go through it all, too. We endured many failed medical attempts, felt the deep grief of a birthmother changing her mind, and lost 6 precious embryos that we adopted and implanted. Finally, we brought our sweet boy home from Kyrgyzstan in October of '07. It was miraculous! We tried bringing home two children at the same time, but it did not work out how we planned. We have now been waiting over one year to bring our second son home from Kyrgyzstan. Thanks for sharing all that you do because it truly helps those that might not have support otherwise.

Hello, Adulthood...But Not Goodbye, Childhood

During these waning days of summer, new adults are slowly blossoming and, for one, childhood is very gradually beginning its tentative wave...