Saturday, September 08, 2007
The Week Ends on a High Note
I went to the school on Thursday afternoon with some trepidation, wondering how firm I would have to be with Kenny, admittedly expecting the worst. I had a long talk with him that morning telling him that he must be quieter in class and to quit acting silly, disturbing his classmates. When I arrived at school, I learned I had missed his music class, that somehow our wires must have gotten crossed on the time so I proceeded on to his regular class to spend the afternoon with the expectation of telling him to "shhhh" the rest of the day or to sit down and do his work. I walked into his class and his face lit up as I pulled a chair up next to his desk. They were working on math most of the time, and I also worked with Kenny on some vocabulary flashcards with photos of food items, which he knew all of them. I was pleasantly surprised to find that he was doing very well, sitting quietly, working on his tasks diligently. Recess came and his teacher and I talked for a moment and she said he had done really well all day, but she had heard there were a few kids who had acted up in music, so I went out to speak with the music teacher. He told me that Kenny was actually really well behaved, and it was obvious to him that he had taken my words to heart. He said "When he started to act up a couple of times all I had to do was give him a look, not even say a word, and he straightened up...he was MUCH better today!". I was relieved and reassured him that all he had to do was let me know and I'd be down there to correct his behavior. I then spent the rest of the afternoon pleasantly with Kenny, watching him shine in the one area he is actually doing very well in, as he seems to have a good grasp of most math concepts for his grade level and things that are new "click" quickly for him. He seemed to really enjoy having me there, and I was able to quietly explain things to him that he wasn't quite understanding as new concepts were introduced. As I sat in those tiny little chairs that only fit a second graders behind, and I watched Kenny working so intently, trying so hard then looking sideways at me with a grin stretching from ear to ear as he figured out the solution to a problem, I think I fell a bit more in love with him. You know how you have those moments with your new children, or perhaps your "old" children? When something...a glance...a giggle...a comment...somehow makes you seem them in a different light and your heart leaps just a little bit? This little guy is trying so hard to please us, trying to understand his new world. Sure, sometimes he is failing, but others he is really reaching and succeeding. I am very proud of who he is, and am slowly gaining more and more respect for him with each passing day.
When he was out at recess he also was very excited to introduce me to his new "frenchy" which is the word he uses to say "friend". I saw him happily running off with a few 1st graders and then they ran up to me as he introduced his new friend, who seemed like a very nice boy who genuinely appeared to enjoy plating with Kenny. Then, much to my surprise, as they were lining up to go in after recess, he was hugged by no less than 3 girls!!! I was reminded of "Kenny and the Aspenettes" at church camp this summer, and how the girls took to him after the first 3 or 4 days. I don't know what it is about this little guy, but he definitely seems to attract the girls!
When we got home, I was busying myself in the kitchen when I turned down the hallway and there were all three boys, Matthew in the center reading them a book. I had spiked their hair with gel at their request, as that is likely the only way they will ever get a mohawk living in this house! For some reason I was so touched by this scene, Matthew kindly reading to his little brothers, explaining the story to Kenny when he didn't understand. He is such a good brother, so accepting and nurturing, not in a "mushy" way but in more subtle, less flashyor attention getting way. He doesn't fawn over anyone, he just quietly surprises you at odd little moments with his thoughtfulness. Last night I was complaining that I was tired, that I haven't slept good lately because of back and hip problems. I walked into my bedroom where he was playing on our computer and he stopped, turned around and said "Mommy...lay down on the bed and take a rest.", and then he hopped up on the bed and started giving me a foot rub!!! Hahaha! The other two walked in and soon I was being pummeled everywhere, and I'll admit that though it was not the most relaxing massage I have ever had, it certainly was the sweetest one.
We end this weekend with our trip to Denver for the evaluation for Kenny at Children's Hospital. We have had to reassure him over and over again that they are not going to hurt him this time, that it is only an examination. He seems quite concerned about what they re going to do, and no amount of reassurances seems to be working. I guess allw e ca do is wait until we get there and he actually experiences it and learns we were right. I sure wish I knew what had happened in his past to cause this much trepidation...did they not tell him prior to his surgeries that he was going to have a procedure performed? Was something done without anesthetic? Did he see something done on someone else that scared him? Whatever it was, it created a real tension in him about medical treatments and a lack of trust in what people tell him. Hopefully he will learn through this that we will always be honest, and he can trust what we say. So, tomorrow we will make our 5 hour drive to Denver and surely learn quite a bit about what the future holds for us, both medically and financially.
I also felt very humbled and quite undeserving reading the uplifting comments on my last post "Back to School for Mom". I also received a couple of encouraging emails in response to it as well. I want to thank those of you who have taken the time to comment directly in the blog or to send emails. I have learned a lot from many of your suggestions, and I have also felt boosted at times when it is sorely needed, when patience is running thin and the world seems a little overwhelming. Joan's comments touched me more deeply than anything has in a long time, and while I sense she might be a teensy weensy bit prejudiced it is just nice to know that others perceive you in such a positive light, especially when at moments you don't really see the bigger picture because you are so focused on the details.
Gotta hurry and finish so I can get some sleep! Dominick's snoring is remidning me it is very late :-)
During these waning days of summer, new adults are slowly blossoming and, for one, childhood is very gradually beginning its tentative wave...