This week we finally agreed on a name, and some documents have been sent off including it. It is the first time I have seen his name in print, knowing who it is attached to and that soon it will be as much a part of my life as Dominick, Matthew and Josh's names are. We tried out several and even had a post-it note stuck to the fridge to see if any of them "grew" on us. My mom and I spent a couple of late nights IM'ing about it.
This was HARD! Imagine, those of you who perhaps haven't adopted or haven't adopted older children, sitting down at the kitchen table and looking at your child who is then 8 and having to come up with a name that captures their essence. Imagine that task being made harder by not having even met them yet! So much is wrapped up in a name, so much of our identity, isn't it? There are names we didn't like because we had known someone with that name and didn't care for them, or because it sounded too "weak" or not smiley enough. I wanted a name that could be used two or three ways...like John, Johnny or Jonathan (not the name we picked).
What if you had gone along, merrily living your life and suddenly someone starting calling you by another name? Wouldn't that be the oddest thing, and something that would anger you? I imagine, frankly, that he will go by his birth name or a diminutive version we have already taken to calling him here at home. But we wanted to put some thought into an American name just in case he changes his mind and wants to be called by something less unusual.
I remember seeing Matthew's name for the first time in writing from an outside source. It was on his plane ticket home, which we bought prior to leaving. Wow, did that make it all real...and it made me cry. This was really happening, there was a little boy out there who would become Matthew La Joy and having that ticket PROVED it! Now we have a name for the newest La Joy, and that too makes it a bit more real.
So, after much discussion and consideration, the name is :::::::::::drum roll:::::::::::::
Kenneth "T" La Joy.