tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35990418.post2669699877634068334..comments2024-03-08T13:52:22.224-07:00Comments on LAJOY FAMILY: Beautiful, Discouraging DayCindy LaJoyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16486626867331586704noreply@blogger.comBlogger9125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35990418.post-56950028562817128272012-04-24T08:30:17.600-06:002012-04-24T08:30:17.600-06:00You have set me to wondering--again--about the mys...You have set me to wondering--again--about the mysteries of the brain. I can site examples of when I made decisions--very poor ones--that mimic Kenny's and had the same feeling that I couldn't stop the runaway train of my brain. Since I already know about myself that I have brain biochemical defects I chalk those decisions up to that. As far as I know there are no physical defects. Strange and mystical thing, the brain, probably one of the most complicated, awe-inspiring<br />creations in this world if not many others. Perhaps in Kenny's lifetime there will be discoveries that will help him compensate for some of his challenges. That will be some of my prayers for him, and for you, Cindy, peaceful sleep to renew you, support and resources, the continued love of family and friends (a given, but worth praying for), and God's continued love and guidance.<br /><br />Blessings on you,<br />LaelAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35990418.post-53927437766990351722012-04-22T17:09:51.288-06:002012-04-22T17:09:51.288-06:00Hi Cindy,
I don't have any advice for Kenny. ...Hi Cindy,<br /><br />I don't have any advice for Kenny. My guys are almost 5, and came home a year and a half ago at 3 and half. One of my guys does display an almost lack of understanding dangerous situations. However, just today, his twin was the one I completely lost at the Zoo. That was a first. Some nice woman took him to guest services just as we got there, and we both burst into tears. He got away from me, and we weren't separated for more than 10 minutes - but the longest 10 minutes of my life. <br /><br />Keep in mind that my guys are much younger, but for speech therapy, we have downloaded "Milo" A speech therapist developed the program. Honestly, we only downloaded the free app, and haven't downloaded the rest. The number of action words is huge.<br /><br />For math, my favorites are a program called Bugs and Buttons, but it was $5, I think. The other math program is the Umizoomi math program.<br /><br />Good luck. I read your blog a lot.<br /><br />BridgetBridgethttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14465496693388053519noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35990418.post-83400370444895497082012-04-22T16:53:33.628-06:002012-04-22T16:53:33.628-06:00Have you tried incorporating lists of tasks into a...Have you tried incorporating lists of tasks into a narrative story? The brain processes narrative differently than other info. Maybe you need to make up a story about Kenny and what he needs to accomplish. Embellish with some vivid detail. Might kick his brain into a different mode. Sorry, no expert, but know that there is brain research to support the use of stories with even "normal" kids--helps them access the organizing parts of the brain. Daniel Siegel discusses this in his book, The Whole Brained Child.<br /><br />No magic bullet I am sure, but may be worth a try?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35990418.post-58477141330444815942012-04-22T02:31:09.821-06:002012-04-22T02:31:09.821-06:00Sorry for the late night typos! Time for bed, but ...Sorry for the late night typos! Time for bed, but I'm glad I read your post and will be thinking of your family and praying for all of these concerns.<br /><br />Nancy in the MidwestAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35990418.post-37061020529330453852012-04-22T02:27:40.479-06:002012-04-22T02:27:40.479-06:00Woke up from the couch to check some blogs before ...Woke up from the couch to check some blogs before heading up to bed. Read of your frustrations and fears for Kenny and thought of something that may or may not be an option or a help. Not a solution to the organization of thought for Kenny, but maybe a bit of a "break" now and then for you. I know in some states, some can get the help of a PCA for their special needs children. Personal Care Attendant, I believe this means...though I'm not sure. A "helper" is hired to spend time with their child, doing activities together or spending learning time together, etc. I know you'd want to be extremely careful in who that would be, but often the time is spent together in your own home. I know this would still require much thought and planning on your part, but it might also give you some time to spend on the other kids' schoolwork while a PCA spent time with Kenny. These families receive some funding to pay for the PCA, and in some cases, their own older children (older teen or adult relative) are paid to spend the time. Just a thought, though I know you also have many adults in your lives who might spend some one on one time with Kenny anyway. <br /><br />We don't struggle nearly to the extent your family is with some of these issues, but I can relate to older adopted children not having what often seems to be "common sense" concerning simple things. I know in my head that it comes from their lack of experience and even cultural differences that caused these gaps. But I can relate to your frustrations and imagine how hard it must be when these gaps are effected by even more damage done in early years. <br /><br />I suspect now that some of Kenny's struggles have been better explained to you, you might be noticing them more. That and the fact that as your other kids mature, you see the differences even more. That surely must cause more worry and concern, as other kids grow further beyond him at this point. Keep on doing what you are already doing for Kenny...and all that you continue to search for to help. That's an enormous task, I can tell from your descriptions. In the meantime, I will pray for your encouragement and for "break throughs" for your amazing Kenny. The love and help all of you pour out on him is helping him is helping him so much towards being able to love himself and give himself the space to grow, make mistakes, and learn. Without that, who knows what his own frustrations might cause him become? <br /><br />May God bless you with the ability to "take heart" and to continue to persevere and to advocate for Kenny.<br /><br />Nancy in the MidwestAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35990418.post-58281899336874346112012-04-21T23:30:00.464-06:002012-04-21T23:30:00.464-06:00Cindy -- Hi!
My heart goes out to you! ... and to ...Cindy -- Hi!<br />My heart goes out to you! ... and to Dominick! You've taken on such a huge task by opening your arms and your hearts to these children! I can see where there would be days like today, when it all seems totally overwhelming. By the same token, you continue to impress me with your dedication and your skill and your compassion in working with all your children, not just Kenny.<br /> Lately, I've been facing some things that have seemed pretty anxiety-producing to me, and I've begun practicing trusting in God "just for today." "Just for today," God will walk me through. "Just for today," God will give me the strength and vision and capabilities I need. .... and so forth. I've found it helpful this way to concentrate on just what's in front of me, rather than getting overwhelmed by looking at the big picture. Perhaps there may be some help for you in this as well, so I offer it up to you with love and prayers.<br />Blessings, Cindy, and God's shalom!<br />KayeAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35990418.post-19715538880384259022012-04-21T22:17:16.430-06:002012-04-21T22:17:16.430-06:00vitallinks.net is the correct onevitallinks.net is the correct oneJoycehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11103468879639388287noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35990418.post-12043027065728235782012-04-21T22:11:17.841-06:002012-04-21T22:11:17.841-06:00Two quick thoughts which mya be totally unhelpful ...Two quick thoughts which mya be totally unhelpful - but have you tried getting him to draw the instructions with arrows as opposed to writing?? <br />My other thought is have you looked into any listening therapy for brain organisation - I know with Central Auditory Processing that was offered as an option for my son, but it ended costing way too much esp as the CAP diagnosis wasnt confirmed and Ry had more sensory processing issues. We do a different listening therapy for him which really has helped him amazingly for brain organisation. <br />You might find info on that from vitallinks.org.<br />JoyceJoycehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11103468879639388287noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35990418.post-30140266237629243552012-04-21T20:03:39.857-06:002012-04-21T20:03:39.857-06:00No advice--but thank you for writing about this. ...No advice--but thank you for writing about this. Your experiences describe my son to a "T". He is 7, adopted at age 5. We adopted him together with his bio sisters (now 9 and 3). He is a terrific kid; kind, loving and a hard worker. But he also struggles to put things "in order" and getting him to complete what seems to be a simple task can take hours. We are making it though--and so are you. You are a terrific, patient mom!<br />~KimAnonymousnoreply@blogger.com